EDITOR’S NOTE: This is a weekly column from former sports reporter and editor Mike Bass. Bass will be contributing to The Enquirer by offering advice for sports fans, athletes and youth sports parents and coaches through a weekly Q&A. You can reach him at [email protected] or on Twitter @SportsFanCoach1.
Last week, I declared myself a Bengals fan for the rest of the season and accepted your suggestions to show it. Eat Skyline Chili (check) and Graeter’s ice cream (check). Write about my journey (check). Self-medicate with alcohol (ready if necessary). Bend the knee (check). Knee-jerk react to the play calling (laughed out loud):
“First run,” @marshotel72 tweeted, “tweet (to) fire Zac Taylor.”
I also was told what I could do with my declaration.
That was basically the theme after I used a tweeted meme of pledge as my first post on a Bengals fan Facebook page. To politely paraphrase: Go dump a bowl of Skyline on your head. ... Take your “fair weather” butt elsewhere. ... No “bandwagon” fans here, pal.
“On behalf of all bengals fans,” I was told, “we don't want you.”
Can you feel the love?
* * *
After the wild finish of Bengals 34, Chiefs 31, more fans will change their stripes to orange and black come playoff time. Are you ready? I promised last week to revisit the whole bandwagon thing, and what better time than now, after placing myself in the middle of the debate?
This was good for me. I felt embraced and empowered by your support. I also felt how offended and outraged you could be in your condemnation. I did not take it personally. I knew it was coming. I wanted to feel this and not just observe this. I know this is personal for you. For me, too.
Adding a favorite to a hometown team is nothing new for me. Want to know how old I am? I adopted the AFL Jets when the counterculture-cool “Broadway Joe” Namath upset the NFL establishment. The hometown Bears still were my team, but Chicago was 1-13 that season.
Must you only like one team? Must you adopt every team for life? What if your circumstances change? What if the team’s does? What if your favorite player leaves? A friend since age 7 is a devout Packers fan, but he temporarily shifted his support to rival Minnesota when it added Bret Favre.
Who decides what is OK? A Fan Tribunal? The Court of Public Opinion? Your friends? Social media?
You.
“Is part of the idea of fandom having to prove your bona fides to the non-accepting?” a lawyer friend asked on my personal Facebook page.
Only if you so choose. Generally, I do not. But I am happy to tell my back story, as I did last week, and hear yours.
“You must be one of those people who think you are more famous than you really are,” I was told on that Bengals fan Facebook page.
Yeah, I’m not going there.
Most comments on that page ranged from conditional welcome to uncensored vitriol for a supposed two-game bandwagoner who needed to commit for life or scram.
There were exceptions.
“This reminds me of Pat McAfee trying to give the Bengals some love just for fans to (expletive) on him for not properly acknowledging Tee Higgins,” Andrew Pottinger wrote. “Kinda embarrassing as a Bengals fan to see so many toxic responses. I welcome whoever wants to be a Bengals fan. The more the better imo.”
Matt Laughlin called one ardent objector “probably the same person complaining we don't get enough national love.”
“We need more people to hop in on the Bengals!” Rob Sheumaker wrote. “Welcome Mike. Don't understand the fans that don't want new fans, and then they are the same ones that complain about the national media not talking about the Bengals enough. More fans equals bigger market! Bigger the market, the better it is for the team! Thanks for your support for the team! WHO DEY!”
Thanks for having my back, guys.
I’m sure others en route will appreciate you, too.
* * *
I am not here to judge. I have been on both sides.
I respect the allegiant and their loyalty. The longer your commitment, the more pain you endured, the bigger the payoff. A friend and lifetime Bengals fan called me Sunday and told me she cried after watching 34-31. I do not have that deep a connection now, but I can relate. When the Cubs won the World Series, I cried.
I watched the 34-31 ending transfixed by the drama ... astounded and confused by what Zac Taylor was doing and what Tony Romo was saying ... and when it was over, it took me a second or two to take it all in before I exhaled and smiled and asked myself, “Did that really happen?”
As a new Bengals fan, with a long history with the team and city, I could enjoy this, my way. I could share that joy with my friend and other Bengals fans. What is the harm?
I am tickled for those Bengals fans with lifetime bonds to the team and with a sense of community for each other. You are passionate. You show it. Your team needs you and your commitment. This is your calling. You might see your rivals as enemies, but this is part of the game, of the serious fun, if you treat it that way.
Some of you might call yourselves the only “real” fans, sparking a heated debate that also is fair game, with no right or wrong answer. But when you treat other fans as enemies, when you feel a duty to guard fandom by berating or bullying those who define it differently, what do you gain by shooing them away? Maybe the backing of those who think like you is enough. Your choice.
What could you lose?
Do you want the Bengals to be a mom-and-pop shop, or do you want to help grow the brand? If you felt like an ambassador, what would you do? Other Bengals fans did not try to recruit me, their kindness did. Granted, nobody likes poseurs acting like they own your turf, but wouldn’t it be cool to go somewhere else and see people wearing Burrow and Chase jerseys?
Why deny anyone wanting to support or test-drive your team? Sometimes you date before Till Death Do Us Part.
“Watch whoever you enjoy,” @Dwhit013 tweeted. “I don’t believe in gatekeepers.”
Your fandom can be whatever you want it to be. It might fit nicely into a label. Bengals fan. But labels also can be weaponized to stereotype and criticize. Bandwagon. Fair weather. Those terms have negative connotations and discount the individual. You. Me.
Why not ask each other what brought you to Bengaldom? Be curious, not judgmental. You might find that you like what you hear. Or not. At least you know.
“My college teams – Hoya BB, OSU FB – made me realize that gatekeeping fandom is dumb for every reason,” @Chazperin tweeted. You CAN change (into) your stripes, but no one chooses who to fall in love with. Welcome home.”
Thank you.
I am a Bengals fan. My team won. I still am a Bears fan. Both of my teams won. Sunday was a good day.
One of my teams is headed for the playoffs. Who Dey!
“I'm not huge on excluding any fans,” @morans14 tweeted. “The more the merrier and there is room for everyone on the Bengals Fanwagon.”
If this keeps up, we’re gonna need a bigger boat.
Email Bass at [email protected] or reach out to him @SportsFanCoach1 on Twitter if you want to be included next week. His website is MikeBassCoaching.com.
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